How violence affects children

Intimidation
Putting children in fear by using looks, loud actions, loud gestures, loud voice, smashing things, destroying property
Fear for their physical safety

Sexual stereotyping
Copying abuser’s dominant and abusive behavior
Copying victimized passive and submissive behavior
Unable to express feelings or who they are

Threats
Learn to manipulate because of their own safety issues due to effects of violence in family
Expressing anger in a way that is violent, abusive, or not expressing anger at all because of their own fear

Using children
Being put in the middle of fights
Children may take on roles, responsibilities of parents and give up being children
Children seen and not heard
Children being used to solve conflicts, asking them to take sides in arguments

Sexual abuse
Shame about body
Feeling threatened and fearful of their sexuality
Learning inappropriate sexual talk behaviours
Children have access to pornography magazines and movies

Physical and mental effects
Children may feel guilt and shame, think it’s their fault
May regress to early stages of development
Cranky, crabby kids
Demanding and withdrawn
Crave / need nurturing from anyone

Emotional abuse
Doubting reality
Fear of doing wrong
Inconsistent limits and expectation by caregiver
Fear of expressing feelings
Inability to learn at school
Low self esteem

Isolation
Inability to develop social skills
Feeling alone and different
Keeping harmful ‘secrets’
Can’t have friends over because of the need to hide the violence
Not trusting of adults